Tag Archives: Lost After Dark

Worst Films of 2015

Now that I’ve gotten by Best Films of 2015 out of the way, here are the worst.

Special Mention

Southpaw – I kind of wish I gave it a lower rating than 2 stars because it deserves a place on my list. Okay, so it’s not one of the top 10 worst films of 2015, but it certainly is my most disappointing film of that year for all the lazy boxing cliches and complete lack of real-world authenticity. Read the full review by clicking on the title because I don’t want to go through all my grievances again.

Dishonorable Mentions

Aloha, The Boy Next Door, Fifty Shades of Grey, The Lazarus Effect, Unnatural, The Vatican Tapes, Deep Dark, Blunt Force Trauma

Some of the usual suspects here, but also a lot of low budget horror movies.

The List

10. Point Break

Huge budget. Huge stinker. This film deserves a spot on my list for destroying the memory of one of my favourite films growing up. They really should have changed the name of the film and the characters and marketed it as a different movie. Wouldn’t have made it less shit, but it would have made it less offensive.

9. Extraction

Bruce Willis is heading toward Nicolas Cage territory. This vanilla action-thriller offers virtually nothing new, interesting or exciting.

8. The Transporter Refueled

Was never a big fan of the Transporter franchise, even when Jason Statham was headlining it. Exchange him with significantly less charismatic Ed Skrein (he was OK in Deadpool as the villain), make the production shittier by 40%-50%, and this is the film you end up with.

7. Poltergeist

I recall the original 1982 Poltergeist was scary. I will recall the 2015 remake as laughably bad. Zero tension, zero atmosphere, zero scares. It’s a complete and utter mess.

6. Area 51

I was a little excited by this movie because I used to be obsessively fascinated by Area 51, the place where the government stashes all the secret alien stuff if conspiracy theorists are to be believed. But they really dropped the ball on this one. Part of it is the low budget (looks and feels cheap), part of it is the awful found-footage trope, and part of it is that it’s just plain bad. I almost feel bad for putting this film on the list because it’s so amateurish.

5. Hot Pursuit

In any other year, this might be the worst comedy of the year (see below). I like the actresses (Reese Witherspoon, Sofia Vergara), but this was just so lame and cringeworthy that I couldn’t help but feel extremely disappointed — for them and for myself.

4. Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension

This entry should come as no surprise to anyone who has followed my Worst Of lists, as Paranormal Activity is always bound to make an appearance. The scariest part of this film is that it could actually be the worst of the entire franchise. Shudder.

3. Mortdecai

I didn’t believe in the rumours so I checked it out for myself. Huge mistake. This was one of the few times in my life that I’ve actually felt embarrassed for the actors in a movie. It really is that criminally unfunny.

2. The Gallows

The premise of a death haunting a school play seemed like a decent idea, and yet somehow the filmmakers made the worst of it. The result was a shoddy, nonsensical production and an unwatchable horror flick without any scares.

1. Lost After Dark

If there is one thing this year’s Worst Of list has taught me, it is that I need to stay away from low-budget horror movies. This sorry excuse of a slasher movie that tried to pay “homage” to the crap slashers of the 80s was the worst of them all. This film was so bad that it went beyond “so bad it’s good”.

And there you have it.

Lost After Dark (2015)

lost after dark

I was coming off the disappointing Curse of Downers Grove and felt things couldn’t get much worse when I decided to watch Lost After Dark, a low budget slasher movie. I turned out to be very very wrong. Compared to Lost After Dark, Downers Grove is a damn near-masterpiece.

I didn’t actually expect it to be any good, though I was hoping the film would surprise me as I had rather quite enjoyed 2003’s Wrong Turn, a similar sort of movie about a bunch of young people who find themselves being hunted down by a bunch of cannibalistic inbreeding freaks.

Wrong Turn was not generally well-received, but I remember it being tense and scary. Lost After Dark was the complete opposite. As a homage to 80s slasher flicks, the premise is that a group of young people find themselves lost after a vehicle breakdown, and soon after the carnage begins.

Apart from moronic cardboard characters, the film suffers from a distinct lack of genuine scares or intriguing developments. A big reason is the laughably designed killer, who looks more like a parody than someone you ought to be running from. And while the film doesn’t take itself too seriously, it’s not exactly tongue-in-cheek enough to be fun either. Throw in some tame, unimaginative killings, bad acting and a “keep gettin’ ’em cheques” performance from Robert Patrick in more or less an cameo role, and what you end up with is film that’s bad but not consciously bad enough to be “so bad it’s good.”

I understand the aim was replicate that retro 80s slasher vibe, though the problem is that the vast majority of such films from that era were actually really terrible. Why you would want to aspire to recreate that without trying to surprise us with something different or intelligent is beyond me.

0.5 stars out of 5